Tell me would you rather
Bring your teddy bear to life...
Or speak in fluent turtle
"Doobedy dobedy dife?"
- David Revere
- Hey good looking! Welcome to my big plunder pile of silly things. Click one of those links on the right to get started!
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Saturday, May 19, 2007
Tubby
Marjorie had the misfortune of finding a gecko in the bathtub the other night. The little guy lay directly in the middle of the tub with his hands folded behind his head. His eyes were closed, so he didn't notice her right away when she pulled back the shower curtain.
His eyes flicked open when he heard her consequent "eeeek," and one hundredth of a second later he was desperately attempting to scamper up the slick, bathtub wall. After sliding back down seven times in a row, he gave up, put his hands over his eyes, and began to cry.
Having recovered from her initial surprise, Marjorie took pity on the creature. "Don't cry, little thing." She sat down on the edge of the tub. "I'm not going to hurt you, though would you mind telling me what you're doing in my bath?"
With his hands still over his eyes, the gecko replied in a tiny, trembling voice, "You're always getting in and having a beautiful time, but I've never been so miserable. It's cold, I can't get out, and now you've seen me naked." He interrupted himself a fresh round of sobbing.
"Poor little fellow," said Marjorie. "I believe you have no idea you're a lizard!"
"Don't want to be a lizard," the gecko sniffed. "Want to be a you."
Marjorie was touched. She placed her hand gently next to him on the bathtub floor. "I'm afraid you can never be a me, but, I know what you can be."
He put his hands down from his eyes and stood there looking about as dejected as a gecko can look.
"You can be a friend," she said.
One hundredth of a second later, he blinked twice with pleasure and scampered on to her hand.
Marjorie named him Tubby, sewed him little gecko sweaters and little gecko pants, and is making him spaghetti tonight.
His eyes flicked open when he heard her consequent "eeeek," and one hundredth of a second later he was desperately attempting to scamper up the slick, bathtub wall. After sliding back down seven times in a row, he gave up, put his hands over his eyes, and began to cry.
Having recovered from her initial surprise, Marjorie took pity on the creature. "Don't cry, little thing." She sat down on the edge of the tub. "I'm not going to hurt you, though would you mind telling me what you're doing in my bath?"
With his hands still over his eyes, the gecko replied in a tiny, trembling voice, "You're always getting in and having a beautiful time, but I've never been so miserable. It's cold, I can't get out, and now you've seen me naked." He interrupted himself a fresh round of sobbing.
"Poor little fellow," said Marjorie. "I believe you have no idea you're a lizard!"
"Don't want to be a lizard," the gecko sniffed. "Want to be a you."
Marjorie was touched. She placed her hand gently next to him on the bathtub floor. "I'm afraid you can never be a me, but, I know what you can be."
He put his hands down from his eyes and stood there looking about as dejected as a gecko can look.
"You can be a friend," she said.
One hundredth of a second later, he blinked twice with pleasure and scampered on to her hand.
Marjorie named him Tubby, sewed him little gecko sweaters and little gecko pants, and is making him spaghetti tonight.
Saturday, May 12, 2007
The Last Junior Mint
The last junior mint slid out quietly into Sam’s hand. He held the morsel up in front of his eyes so that the movie screen grew out of focus.
“A creamy, flowing, refreshingly light mint center surrounded with just the right amount of rich dark chocolate coating,” said Sam, who knew the back of the box by heart.
“Shhhhhh!” someone whispered in front. Beside him, little Natalie turned her head to see what her fabulous big brother was doing. Sam caught her eyes - saw them flicker wide for the briefest moment at the sight of the work of art between his fingers.
“Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate,” said the movie screen.
A smile started on Sam’s face. “Heaven’s taste,” he thought. “Beauty’s flavor.”
The smile got into his eyes. He reached over and placed the mint in his sister's hand.
“A creamy, flowing, refreshingly light mint center surrounded with just the right amount of rich dark chocolate coating,” said Sam, who knew the back of the box by heart.
“Shhhhhh!” someone whispered in front. Beside him, little Natalie turned her head to see what her fabulous big brother was doing. Sam caught her eyes - saw them flicker wide for the briefest moment at the sight of the work of art between his fingers.
“Not all treasure is silver and gold, mate,” said the movie screen.
A smile started on Sam’s face. “Heaven’s taste,” he thought. “Beauty’s flavor.”
The smile got into his eyes. He reached over and placed the mint in his sister's hand.
Monday, May 07, 2007
Would You Rather 3
What would you like to have
For your birthday, my dear May?
The Orion Nebula
Or a pool of Creme Brulée?
For your birthday, my dear May?
The Orion Nebula
Or a pool of Creme Brulée?